So Christmas and New Year are over and it is just another few weeks before Valentine’s Day. As per usual newspaper columns are churning out one loneliness article after another for single people saying how bad it feels to be alone without a partner and how toxic loneliness is blah blah blah.
For me I am sick of this.
The truth is not everyone is built for relationship, or not everyone can be in a relationship. They key to being single is to be content with what you have and not focusing on what you don’t have. It always confound me how some of these columnists throw out notion of being single is bad because they feel so lonely having no company. For me, if you think being single is bad for you, actively find someone. According to statistics online dating sites are extremely active during this period because people are desperate to find a company by Valentine’s Day so they won’t be alone. If that’s the case, instead of spreading negativity like strayed animals spraying on the streets, join these crowds and spend more time swiping left or right, whatever suits you. Nobody needs to read another 600 articles of loneliness during festive season when you are not really making an effort to be content with who you are and what your life is.
In this day and age of craziness, spreading negative sentiments simply because you have the platforms to do so when everyone is trying to be positive with their New Year resolutions that may or may not fail is not helping anyone. Maybe you find a need to express yourself. Then ring a friend, talk to your parents or see your psychiatrist.
Being single does not equal to being lonely. People who are relationship-craze will find someone no matter what and no matter what the consequences are for them. But if you can’t find someone for this so called social milestone, then just be content and make the most out of it. When I say making the most out of it, it is not about pretending to be content but look positively around you and what you have. There is nothing called too much solitude if you actually appreciate what you have and stop focusing and moaning on what you don’t have. Not everyone can have it all and being constantly envied about your friends whom you think having it all does not give you a better life. Further, you never know what’s behind the door so this kind of groundless envy is taking you nowhere. If you are scared of being judged by the society or the people around you for being single, then you have failed the fundamentals of living – love yourself. If you can’t love yourself why would you expect others to love you?
I respect everyone’s social and relationship status as long as they are not wrecking other people’s. But the fact that I saw 4 articles in one week across different news site about how bad being single and alone is really pissed me off.
One must remember when it involved another person, everything is out of your control. So moaning about something that’s out of control and without fixing who you are internally is just a scam of relationship advice. If you can’t be happy with yourself then probably you don’t even know who you are and what you want, then what makes you think you would be less lonely or happier in a relationship? Nobody in this world has the responsibility to make you happy. If you found the love of your life, which I have a number of friends who did, that’s just a bonus to your existence in this world. And everyone should know that this bonus is not guaranteed. Being content with yourself, and your life is the key to happiness and the key to wipe that self-pitying loneliness talk out of your head. And that is your responsibility. Even when you think that writing about it and telling the world is therapeutic for you, the rest of the world doesn’t need to read about it. Just pay your psychiatrist to listening to your endless moaning. If moaning about being single and moaning makes your happy then that’s your choice, but nobody else need to take that blunt of your inconsiderate behaviour to feed into your happiness.
Seriously, be happy with who you are and what you have and stop all those moaning and complaining. Your life is in your hands and your hands alone. Nobody else in the world is responsible for your happiness if you are not building it yourself. Anything else are icing on the cake and one should never take them for granted.
